by Kimberly Engel

I was walking into the grocery store the other day and noticed the Salvation Army had once again set up camp for the holiday season. The familiar red tin was clanging, the bells were ringing, and the men in charge were filled with holiday cheer. “Merry Christmas!” they cheered with a jovial demeanor. Some folks put change in the tins, while others kept walking. Me? I smiled and simply said “Happy Holidays” then continued on with my daughter in tow. But one man didn’t let up. He said it to me again, “Merry Christmas!” Three times to be exact. Each time he said it, it became more obvious to me that he was annoyed that I wasn’t extending the “correct” greeting in return.

I understand that the Salvation Army is a Christian roots organization, and I don’t have an issue with their declarations of the season. I do, however, have a problem with the inability to recognize that not everyone they greet celebrates THEIR holiday. One this particular occasion, they were camped out in a predominantly Jewish neighborhood, yet they refused to respect every shopper and simply wish them a “Happy Holidays”.

It comes down to this: some people truly believe that a holiday greeting should, in some way, reflect what THEY celebrate or believe this time of year. You hear people say that “Happy Holidays” takes the Christ out of Christmas. One of my more opinionated ex co-workers once told me, “I refuse to say Happy Holidays. I celebrate Christmas and that is what I am gonna say to people. If they don’t like it, too bad. They must have issues.”

Ummmmm. I don’t think so.

Since when did wishing someone a good holiday become about us? Isn’t the goal of a holiday greeting to convey your wishes that THEY have a good holiday? The one that THEY celebrate? Why then, would you automatically greet them with the salutation that you want to hear, the one that fits your season, and not the one that suits their celebration?

Of course, it gets tricky…we don’t usually know what most people celebrate this time of year. So, the safe thing to say is “Happy Holidays”. I happen to love this greeting. It covers all the bases and extends good wishes to all mankind. I don’t see how anyone could find this offensive. After all, isn’t it a moot point to wish someone a “Merry Christmas” when you know they are going home and lighting their menorah?

There are certain people in my life that insist on wishing me a “Merry Christmas” even though they know I am Jewish. They send cards with religious overtones and I am left to wonder if it isn’t with hopes of changing my core beliefs.

The majority of our nation still lacks an overall awareness and sensitivity to those who aren’t like us. While it may be unintentional, it reminds us that we all could stand to gain a broader perspective. We live in a Christian majority…but we also live in America, where everyone is welcome and religious freedoms are a gift. We befriend those who aren’t like us everyday, so why not offer holiday greetings that send the message of acceptance…the message of kindness and tolerance. The message that says “I know you are different than me, so I wish for you to have a good holiday, even if it isn’t the holiday that I celebrate.”

The next time someone that knows me and is well aware that I am Jewish still insists on wishing me a “Merry Christmas”, I plan to wish them a “Happy Birthday” on September 7th. After all, that is MY birthday…and I will wish them a big, hearty “Happy New Year!” in mid-September. After all, that is when MY new year (Rosh Hashana) begins.

Then, maybe, they will finally get it.

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